AND THUS, I ANNOUNCE MY CANDIDACY FOR NEPAL PM

It’s official. I hereby announce that in the next few years, I will be running for the position of Prime Minister of Nepal. Do vote for me, you always-complaining-about-leaders-but-never-realizing-that-it-was-you-who-voted-them Nepalese compatriots.

Phew. Be cool. Deep breath.

Really, just three sentences were all that I needed? Writing about that eased the frustration that I had accumulated over the course of my life. Well, you never know the power of three sentences!

Nepal’s political scenario is something that I have written about often. Some are filled with anger, some with desperation and some with an attempt to make a genuine point. None of them are as promising as it must have been. I mean, look at us. All we care about is putting blame on those 70+-year-old leaders whom we should be giving more elderly respect. Sorry, should not have said that. But I just did. So, screw you.

Where was I?! Ah, announcing my candidacy. Seriously, I want to fulfill the prophecy of being the nice and handsome PM who steered the country to the new era just like Justin Trudeau is doing in Canada right now. Then, Nepalese will not have to complain about an uneducated person becoming the PM or elaborating about the history of UK PMs who had their education at Oxford College. Come on, people. I understand your sentimentality but that is not how things get sorted out. Nor it had ever been. Never. Someone needs to stand up and just declare his candidacy like I am doing right now.

What’s that? My spidey-senses are already active.

What is this author talking about? Is he stupid? Is he mocking the person who pushed PM Deuba too far in the ‘Sanjha Sawaal’ discussion? If you are so full of confidence, then why don’t you run for PM some day.

More blame. Poor us. Some habits never die. Something does not go our way. Find a person to put that blame on. And to answer your question. You bet, I did. I am mocking him. But not only him. You, me, the entire Nepali voters. We need to understand that pushing our PM to his limits is doing no good. The video will become an internet sensation in the Nepali diaspora. Maybe get retweeted a lot of times. Or commented on. Or find some bloggers, like me, to write about. The incident will be ephemeral. People will forget about it sooner than you think. That is the world we live in. The social media world. You only become famous for few seconds before others snatch the fame from you.

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This is serious stuff. (Image source: Buzzzle.com)

I hate that I have to do this. I love it, too. Finally, I don’t have to see my people sitting on their sofa and complaining about Nepal never getting properly developed or never getting freed from the chains of corruption. The sooner the prophecy turns true, the sooner the agony will vanish. Nepali will be able to focus on improving their business and divert their time to discussing intellectual matters. I don’t recall the last time we had meaningful discussions taking place or laid out the blueprints for a bright future. I don’t recall a time where we put together our list of strengths and used that to our advantage. Isn’t backbiting about others’ weaknesses one of the proud things we do when we have nothing else to do? This is one of the worst ways to waste our time. Nothing to gain unless the person we are backbiting about isn’t there because we are not giving that person a chance to improve on his weakness.

The biggest obstacle of our generation is that we fail to recognize that the promising candidates share the same ambitions and hopes as us. We refrain from voting for them because they just don’t have any experience in politics. We think that they are just a new breed who have lived in East Blue all their lives and not ventured into the Grand Line or even the dangerous New World. We forget that their aim is to reach Raftel, the furthest point in One Piece.

You know the greatest paradox of all time: You require experience to get a job. You seek a job to get the experience. Such a crazy world we live in. When I first voted in Nepal, I did not vote the promising candidates because I believed that would be a waste of my precious vote. I thought they showed good promises but lacked any political experience to do the job properly.  My amateur thoughts. Instead, I voted for the old parties’ candidates. I know some of you did the same. I am pretty sure if I run for PM, not many will vote for me because I am unknown in the Nepali diaspora. Just as was the case for Arsene Wenger when he was officially the manager for Arsenal FC; however, given the chance, he went on to become the greatest manager Arsenal FC has ever known.

So, just give the promising candidates a chance. Maybe they will fulfill our prophecy. Whatever happens, stay with them. Have faith. Have your parents and families believe in these candidates.  Don’t let selfish feelings cloud your rational judgment.

Stop complaining and putting the blame on someone else. Stop waiting for that Someone who will put this country out of misery. Stop hoping that someone brave enough will challenge to oppose the bandh. Stop hoping that someone will ask questions that will break the hopes of the leaders. Stop talking about all of your miseries. Stop this chain of events. How long have we been waiting for this miracle? It’s been years. No one has arrived or will arrive. We should all make our moves. Let’s do this together.

So, have I made you believe in me? I announce my candidacy once again. Now, will you vote for me?

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